What Does It Mean to Be "Whipped" in a Relationship?

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Plus, where the term comes from and how to use it

Co-authored by Tobi Nwodo and Bertha Isabel Crombet, PhD

Last Updated: September 22, 2025 Fact Checked

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Whipped Meaning

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Is it offensive?

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Using “Whipped”

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Origin

If you’ve ever left a night out with the boys to go spend time with your girlfriend, your friends may have jokingly called you “whipped.” Although it can be used in a lighthearted way, this slang term has developed a negative connotation within relationships, as it typically refers to someone who is overly doting on their partner to the point of being controlled by them. If you want to learn more about what this expression means, where it came from, and how to use it to razz your friends in relationships, keep reading!

Whipped Slang Meaning

To be "whipped" describes someone in a relationship, often a man, who is subservient to their partner, prioritizes their significant other's needs, and allows themselves to be controlled. The slang term can be used as a friendly jab or as a serious insult, depending on the context. It is derived from "whipping boy."

Section 1 of 4:

What does “whipped” mean in slang?

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“Whipped” describes someone who is very submissive to their partner. Although this slang term tends to lean toward men, it’s still considered a unisex term used to describe a person in a relationship who is submissive and subservient to their partner, constantly putting their partner’s needs above their own. While this phrase is often used playfully to suggest someone is really in love and has a healthy obsession with their partner, it can be used as an insult, synonymous with “pathetic” and “lapdog.”^{[1]
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- The term can be considered derogatory and problematic as it plays upon sexist stereotypes in relationships, reinforcing the idea that men are dogs and women are controlling nags.
- “Whipped” also promotes certain aspects of toxic masculinity, along with the idea of “alpha males,” “betas,” and the like.
- Whether or not someone is “whipped” is totally open to interpretation and additional context. For example, some men in relationships might consider themselves whipped simply because they’re the first to apologize after a fight. Others may be perceived as whipped if they do everything their partner tells them to do without question.

Section 2 of 4:

Is “whipped” offensive?

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Calling someone “whipped” can be considered a jab or offense. Saying someone is “whipped” is can sometimes be a derogatory comment about their relationship. It may imply that the “whipped” person is the other’s obedient lapdog or that the other person in the relationship is inherently controlling and manipulative. Because men are typically the “whipped” person in the relationship, the term also plays up the “nagging wife” stereotype.^{[2]
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- Often, the expression is extended to “pu**sywhipped,” which further plays on the sexist stereotype and suggests the woman’s control over the man hinges on sexual acts.
- In general, it’s best to avoid calling someone this unless you know and trust them not to be offended.
- That being said, “whipped” isn’t always used negatively. Many people use the phrase lightheartedly to describe how in love they (or someone they know) are with their partner.

Section 3 of 4:

How to Use “Whipped”

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Use “whipped” playfully among friends. Unless you want to potentially offend someone, only use “whipped” in your close circle and among people who you know won’t take serious offense. For example, if your buddy has only been dating his new girlfriend for a week but he’s already doing extravagant and expensive romantic gestures for her, you might jokingly call him “whipped.” Here are some other ways to use this term without pushing anyone’s buttons:
- “You get her flowers and candy every Friday? Sounds like you’re whipped to me!”
- “Dang, leaving the bar early so you can see her before she falls asleep? You’re whipped!”
- “You’re so whipped if you send her ‘good morning’ texts every day.”

Section 4 of 4:

“Whipped” Slang Origin

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“Whipped” likely comes from the term “whipping boy.” “Whipped” is thought to have been derived from the term “whipping boy,” which has roots in the Early Modern period in Europe. According to some historical accounts, tutors who were in charge of teaching young royals were forbidden to physically punish their “divinely chosen” students as they would otherwise. Since royals could not be submitted to such punishment, a “whipping boy” would symbolically take their place.^{[3]
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- In theory, the royal child would still be “punished” by having to watch their less fortunate counterpart be whipped with a stick and would therefore cease misbehaving.
- Punishments for children who misbehaved during their lessons might include having them kneel on prickly corn cobs or having them whipped with a stick.
- The whipping boy made his first appearance in Samuel Rowley’s play When You See Me, You Know Me in 1605.
- However, many historians argue that this practice was completely fabricated for fiction and then spread as fact.