Why am I dreaming about my crush for these many days ??
Hey Guys,
So I had a crush in my class a long time ago. We were typically friends but my love feelings hit really hard after few days. I asked her out but she said no. Later on we were friends for a really good time until our family had to move to another city.
Even though she isn't my first crush, she keeps appearing in my dreams and I get dreams where I and her live together as a family . If I even try to ask someone else out, before even keeping the first step, my mind hesitates for some unknown reason and stops from doing so.
We still have been talking together about school and stuff through calls but still she reappears in my dreams. I really dunno why this happens to me but a help from you guys would be really appreaciated.
Thanks!!
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Sometimes the people we know become habitual characters in our dreams. It helps to think of your crush as a certain personality or type of person that your dreaming mind is using to convey some character, rather than it being about her literally. To figure out what she represents to you, try to list 3-5 words that best describe her. When you think of her, what do you think about? Is she friendly, calm, and funny? Or maybe caddy, cruel, and confident? Your dreams are using her to show you ways that you might be dealing with someone like her in waking life. She is a stand-in for the type of person that matches your list of descriptions.
Another way to find meaning in dreams about your old crush is to ask the question - who was I during that time in my life, and what might that old me have to offer to my current life scenarios? Your dreams may be indicating that some life lesson you learned when you were into her is coming back into play in your life, and it's time to apply those life lessons, now.
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Another way to find meaning in dreams about your old crush is to ask the question - who was I during that time in my life, and what might that old me have to offer to my current life scenarios? Your dreams may be indicating that some life lesson you learned when you were into her is coming back into play in your life, and it's time to apply those life lessons, now.
It sounds like you never got real closure, so your mind keeps holding on. Dreams don’t mean you should be with her—they’re usually just your brain replaying unresolved feelings and comfort memories. Since she already said no, the healthiest step is to slowly reduce emotional reliance: limit deep calls, focus on new routines, hobbies, and meeting new people without pressure. It’s okay to move on at your own pace, but remind yourself that liking someone else doesn’t erase the past—it just means you’re ready for something new.
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I second this. I used to get it all the time with crushes that have rejected me. They tend to go away once I've processed the emotions healthily like connecting with friends and family and keeping occupied with hobbies.
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Wsg bro I gotchu w the help
(1. THE “UNFINISHED” BUSINESS EFFECT
Psychologically, humans tend to remember uncompleted tasks or unresolved desires better than completed ones (known as the Zeigirnik Effect). Because you remained friends and still talk, your brain hasn't "filed away" the romantic pursuit as a closed chapter. The dreams of living together are likely your subconscious trying to complete the story that your conscious life didn't allow.
(2. THE HESITATION IN NEW RELATIONSHIPS
Your mind hesitates to approach others because it is still using her as the "gold standard." When you think about someone else, your subconscious compares them to the idealized version of her in your dreams. This creates a fear of "settling" for someone else or a subconscious hope that if you stay "available," the dream might one day come true.
TIPS FOR MOVING FORWARD
If you want to open your heart to new people, you may need to adjust your dynamic:
De-idealize the Image: Dreams show a perfect version of a family life. Remind yourself that she is a human with flaws, and she has already expressed that she does not see you in a romantic light
.
Evaluate the Contact: If talking to her about school keeps the "hope" alive, you might need to create a little bit of emotional distance. You don't have to stop being friends, but you might need to limit the frequency of calls while you focus on your new life.
Acknowledge the Fear: Next time you hesitate to ask someone else out, stop and ask yourself: "Am I stopping because I don't like this new person, or because I’m waiting for someone who isn’t coming?"
But as for the dreaming abt her I still gotchu
(1. WISH FULFILLMENT
Your brain may be creating scenarios in which you and your crush live together as a family to satisfy a desire that was never fulfilled in reality. Because she said no, your subconscious "completes" the story in your sleep, providing the emotional payoff (validation, closeness, and family life) that you missed out on.
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(1. THE “UNFINISHED” BUSINESS EFFECT
Psychologically, humans tend to remember uncompleted tasks or unresolved desires better than completed ones (known as the Zeigirnik Effect). Because you remained friends and still talk, your brain hasn't "filed away" the romantic pursuit as a closed chapter. The dreams of living together are likely your subconscious trying to complete the story that your conscious life didn't allow.
(2. THE HESITATION IN NEW RELATIONSHIPS
Your mind hesitates to approach others because it is still using her as the "gold standard." When you think about someone else, your subconscious compares them to the idealized version of her in your dreams. This creates a fear of "settling" for someone else or a subconscious hope that if you stay "available," the dream might one day come true.
TIPS FOR MOVING FORWARD
If you want to open your heart to new people, you may need to adjust your dynamic:
De-idealize the Image: Dreams show a perfect version of a family life. Remind yourself that she is a human with flaws, and she has already expressed that she does not see you in a romantic light
.
Evaluate the Contact: If talking to her about school keeps the "hope" alive, you might need to create a little bit of emotional distance. You don't have to stop being friends, but you might need to limit the frequency of calls while you focus on your new life.
Acknowledge the Fear: Next time you hesitate to ask someone else out, stop and ask yourself: "Am I stopping because I don't like this new person, or because I’m waiting for someone who isn’t coming?"
But as for the dreaming abt her I still gotchu
(1. WISH FULFILLMENT
Your brain may be creating scenarios in which you and your crush live together as a family to satisfy a desire that was never fulfilled in reality. Because she said no, your subconscious "completes" the story in your sleep, providing the emotional payoff (validation, closeness, and family life) that you missed out on.
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